Screwtape and Me
by Regan Curtis
Summary: This is an English project I had to do. Basically what Screwtape would write if he was writing about me.


My dear Wormwood,

I was complete and utterly shocked when I heard you were given another patient. To think you of all beings, you would be allowed to handle another soul only after a few decades! Oh well, who am I to judge our father's decisions.

Anyway, I have been looking over your patients history and it troubles me a bit. It turns out she, she being your patient, is in fact a Christian. Not only that, but she has grown up in a Christian home and is constantly surrounded by the Enemy and His tricks. It will be a difficult task, but there are qualities in this girl that will make your quest simpler.

For one thing she is at the wonderfully insecure age when the whole world seems to be against her. She has feelings of no one caring about her, her not being good enough, and, as with most girls, not looking good enough. Every time she begins to feel this way, you must emphasize these feelings. For example, when she thinks that everyone is unfair and uncaring, remind her of all the times people have ignored her or treated her meanly, even if in reality they didn't. From this you can make her think of why they may be mean to her, which causes her to think of all the awful and sinful things she has done, in the past or recently. This will cause her to feel extremely guilty, and feel as though no one would want to love her. And if you play it right, you may even make her feel as if the Enemy doesn't even love her. This will cause her to become depressed, making it easier to gain control of her soul.

Another tactic you can use against her is her vanity. As with most girls, whether they admit it or not, appearance is very important to them. Causing her to fret about what her outward appearance will draw time way from her inward appearance. The Enemy tells humans that He doesn't look on the outside but what is in the heart. Lucky for us, the world today is so obsessed with looks that is easy to forget about the heart. Plus, your girl has the tendency to compare herself with others, use that. Have compare herself with people who have been noted to be very good looking or have some other appealing look about them. She may feel bad about herself, or even feel as if she has been cheated from looking as nice as others.

As I read more on this patient, I notice one characteristic that she is well known by: she is extremely shy. This quietness has seemed to cripple her socially. While others are laughing and talking, she sits quietly in the corner. She is greatly frustrated with this trait of hers for she feels as though it gets in the way of her making any friends. Now what you must do in this situation in simple. When she begins feeling this way whisper in her ear that it isn't her fault. Making her believe this will be easy for no one likes being at fault for anything. Tell her that everyone else is just rude and that she has a right to be angry with them, even though they have done nothing. If she thinks how ridiculous this is then you can make her feel bad for thinking such thoughts. This will cause her to become angry with herself. She will then, I assume, begin to scold or even mock herself. She forgets that such actions not only cause her pain, but also insult the Enemy. He, having created her, becomes deeply distressed when such brutal words enter her mind. Now if realizes what she is doing she may repent, and we don't want that. Keep her mind as far from the Enemy as possible. Do not let her, for even a moment, believe she can be forgiven for her crimes. And replay her "unforgivable" thoughts, to give her a constant reminder of her wrong doing. Oh, how wonderful it will be. To torture a human soul and cause the Enemy such pain and grief, all at the same time.

Now my dear nephew, I leave this task to you. Do not disappoint me. For as much as love hearing your tortured shrieks, they are nothing compared to the cries of a captured soul.

Your affectionate Uncle,

Screwtape


End file.
